Mended Hearts
by hundan
Summary: She'd come back to him because even though she wasn't going to ever return, this brought her home. Because she couldn't keep this secret from him.
1. Chapter 1

I'm back!

Okay so this one is a replacement to how I see season 11 because I miss Tony and Ziva. In saying that I have only watched the first probably 5 episodes of that season before I stopped watching (I will catch up at some point but I haven't gotten around to it, I just am not as urgent to watch as I used to now my girl has gone.)

Anyways for those of you, like me, that have missed our girl, and her certain dynamic with the one and only Anthony DiNozzo, I hope you enjoy this piece.

Hundan.

* * *

No one knows how much he still struggles with her being gone. Sure in the first few weeks he was back at work everyone had definitely noticed how hard he was taking her absence. But since then he's pulled his walls back up and plastered that mask back on and hidden his feelings from the world.

Every time he closes his eyes he still sees her, still dreams about her. Nothing seems to make the thought of her disappear, not all his movies, not a bottle of whisky, not even another woman. For the last one he's kind of upset at himself but nothing else worked and he had to try and make himself move on, because after all that's what Gibbs had said, they need to move on, because she had.

Not that he got very far with the pretty blonde he met at a coffee shop one morning, he got as far as a little make out session on her couch but it all felt too wrong and when his hands were on her all he could think about was the time his hands, his lips were on Ziva. And it wasn't right and so he had apologised and left.

Nothing seems to wipe the memory of Ziva from his mind and after three months he wonders if it will ever go away, if he will ever be able to move on. He's not sure he will because he loved her. He _still_ loves her and he admits that to himself to no end.

At one point he actually admitted it to Tim and even though he was a drunk stupor Tony still noticed the way Tim was shocked at the admission but he also didn't seemed too surprised by it either. After Tim had taken him home that night and put his drunkenness to bed his Probie had never spoken a word of Tony's little secret blab he'd let spill that night.

Most of the time he just thinks about her and where she would be right now, what she would be doing. He imagines that she would end up somewhere like Greece, living in a small town in a beautiful city teaching English to school children. Or maybe she'd stayed in Israel and just lives off her vegetable garden in a little farm house in the nice countryside.

Or even she's living with Shmeil and she cooks him dinner each night and he shares his thousands of stories with her every day. He hopes that whatever it is she is doing or wherever she may be that she is happy. He wishes he could embrace his own life and be a happy man, but deep down without her with him he will never be fully happy with his life.

Because she is his _one_ and she owns his heart, he just simply cannot change that.

* * *

It's been a hard few days at work and when Tony finishes his glass of whisky and puts the last of his pizza dinner that he couldn't eat into the fridge he loosens his tie some more and thanks God that the case is finally over. He needs some time alone and being home for less than four hours a night for three days took its toll. He finds he needs time to himself more these days because he cannot think about Ziva when there are others about, because sometimes he gets a little upset and they would surely notice the distance he gets from the world when he thinks about her.

He walks to his bedroom and picks up the book on his bedside table. It was one of Ziva's books. He's got all her books here as he was the one who had to pack up her apartment, because she just didn't come back. Saying that task was an easy one would have been a lie, it was quite difficult for him but he felt that it wouldn't be right for anyone but him to do it. Most of her things are in his storage unit, but the small and more personal things are scattered around his apartment. Because he needs those memories of her.

If he couldn't forget her, he'd embrace the memory of her.

He heads to the kitchen with the book and places it on the bench while he reaches for the bottle of Johnny Walker for a refill, but before he can pour it there's a knock at his door. He places the bottle down and heads to greet the visitor. It's probably Tim, he's the only one that calls over to see him unannounced these days.

He opens his door with a remark ready for his Probie about missing him already and hadn't he had enough of him in the long three days they'd had, however that comment died on his lips and his mouth suddenly went dry.

Also he thinks his heart stopped beating.

He goes to whisper her name but not a sound escapes his throat, was he dreaming? Because that was Ziva standing at his door, beautiful curly dark hair spilling over her shoulders and a calm but nervous emotion on her face. She looked just like she did when he left her standing at the airport three months ago.

She smiles softly at him and her eyes suddenly glaze over and get slightly shinny. He stares at her and he's pretty sure his eyes start to match hers, he's feeling tears prick at the back of his eyes, because Jesus, that's Ziva. In DC, in his apartment building, standing right in front of him.

"Ziva" her name finally escapes his lips and he half chokes on the word. He hasn't said her name for a long time now and seeing her right there, truly there in front of him after he thought he would never see her again, it crushes his heart in the best of ways.

"Hello Tony" she replies quietly and he watches one tear escape her eye, because maybe she thought she would never see him again either, but here she is.

He cannot stop himself when he reaches out for her and gathers her in his arms. Her arms come around him also and she clings to him, like she never wants to let him go. Maybe she had missed him as much as he had missed her. His face dips to the curve of her neck and he can't help but smile softly against her skin there, because she's back and in his arms right now. This was what his dreams were made of.

"I never thought I'd see you again" he breathes against her skin and his arms tighten around her a little more. Because he doesn't want to let her out of his grip, never again.

There's a long pause after he says it and he feels the way her hand moves into the back of his hair and her forehead drops to his shoulder.

"Neither did I" she whispers and he almost didn't catch half of it because she struggled to get it out. She never meant to see him again, she never meant to come back. But here she was. Why? What brought her here and changed her mind?

He brought his head back and looked down at her when she lifted her head from his shoulder, she tried not to catch his gaze. She avoided looking at him right now. He feels like she's hiding something and he wonders what that is. He lifts her chin with his hand, bringing her gaze to settle on his. Because he needs it.

"What changed your mind?" he asked quietly as he stared into her teary eyes. He wonders if the tears are from joy or sadness, because he cannot really tell right now.

He watches as she goes to speak her mind, goes to tell him something but whatever it was didn't leave her lips because it seemed suddenly too hard to say and she couldn't get it out. He sees the way she thinks and then looks away again before she takes a deep breath then looks back at him.

"Things changed and… there are things that would be unfair of me to keep from you" she finally gets out and he notices the way her eyes get a little shifty and yes, there is definitely something she is keeping from him. And it seems quite significant.

He wonders what it is that is unfair for her to keep from him? Her love? Her in general? Because yeah, those are things he thinks are unfair that he cannot have when he loves her like he does.

He watches her sigh and she takes a step back while she gathers both of his hands in hers. Looks him right in the eyes.

"Tony, we need to talk" she says and she's suddenly more nervous than he's ever seen her, and yeah she's suddenly gone very serious all of a sudden. It… scares him a little. For the life of him he cannot tell what is on her mind and what she is suddenly serious about needing to tell him, and whatever it is it changed her mind and brought her back to him. When she wasn't likely going to come back.

"Come in" he says quietly as he steps back and he's suddenly very nervous. His heart rate has spiked to twice as fast and he's sure the room just got warmer.

He watches as she slowly walks into his apartment and takes in the changes. The first thing her eyes land on was the old photo of her and Ari as children, the one she used to have in her apartment but now it sat on the table next to his fishbowl. She ran her fingers across the frame, over her brother's face. He sees the soft sad smile that breaks across her face before she turns back to him.

"You cleaned out my apartment?" she asks. He nods slowly and rubs the back of his neck. He wonders how she feels about him doing that and then keeping some of her things.

"Most of it's in storage, I just didn't know what you wanted done with it" _because you never called. _He sees her nod in return.

"Thank you" she whispers. She didn't seem too bothered by it and he thinks he catches another little smile on her face as she takes another look at the photo. He wonders if the roles were reversed would she have done the same? Would she have kept some of his things in her apartment? He guesses he will never know.

She walks over to his couch and takes a seat, her eyes shifting nervously as she watches him follow her. He likes how she still walks around his apartment like she belongs here, even though it's been so long since she's been here.

When he takes his place beside her he sits closer than maybe was considered necessary, but he cannot help himself and it's always just how they have been. They have shared things and done things that make them closer than most married couples these days, so he guesses it's his right to have this kind of proximity with her. And she doesn't move away from him, he feels as though she moves slightly closer even.

She doesn't look at him when she reaches out to gather his hand in hers, but she grips onto his hand like she wasn't planning on letting go and he could feel the nervous tension run through her hand as she held onto him. He laced his fingers between hers in an effort to get her to look at him and it worked, her eyes looked up and settled on his.

She sat there for a while just staring at him and he kept quiet because he could see her trying to word this in her head correctly before she spilled it out to him. But slowly his patience was killing him. Because this wasn't something that seemed very simple. He couldn't think for the life of him what it was she was about to try and tell him.

She looks down at their hands and she gets courage to start talking.

"I wasn't going to come back" she starts softly and those words stop his heart and have him gripping her hand tighter "But then… things changed and I thought about it for a while and I know that keeping something like this away from you would be unfair, it would not be right" she continues and that's when her gaze lifts to his again and she looks him right in the eyes.

"You remember your last night in Israel?" she asks him. Of course he does, it's the one thing he thinks about most. The way her lips found his in the dark of the night, how her naked skin felt under his hands. How it felt to love her wholeheartedly.

"How could I ever forget?" he smiles softly at her. She sends him a small smile in return because she surely remembers it too. That night was a night that had been far too long in the making, and because they both thought it was the last time they would ever see each other, why not give into the love that had been there for so many years?

This is the point where she grips his hand a little tighter and takes in a deep breath.

"Tony, I…" she goes to say what's on her mind and the words stop short. He's never seen her struggle with telling him anything before, not with how hard she is finding it right now. His heart pounds against his chest in anticipation to what she is going to say. However he feels like whatever it is, it will stop his beating heart.

Her eyes shift away from his again but then the words are on her lips finally and she looks back up at him, serious. Sure of herself.

"Tony I'm pregnant" she blurts out and her eyes stare at him, because heck yes that was something huge for her to say. That was something he was not expecting, he never thought he would have Ziva ever say this to him. Sure he's dreamed about it but the fact this has just hit him in reality, damn he was breathless. He just… right now he cannot think of what to say. And yes, his heart had stopped.

She was pregnant. Ziva was pregnant, with _his_ kid.

And she'd come back to him because even though she wasn't going to ever return, this brought her home. Because she couldn't keep this secret from him.

Wow.

They were pregnant.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey Guys.**

**So for the few of you that asked, yes I am still working on Resignation as well as this one, they are both just in the works when I have time to add to them. **

**I am glad a few of you have liked this one so far, hopefully I continue to provide you with enjoyment. Thanks to all of you that reviewed, your opinions mean a lot. **

**This one is a smaller chapter, but it will lead to bigger and better. **

**Hundan.**

* * *

He doesn't know what to say, he doesn't know what to do. This was a lot for him to take in all at once. He sees the way she watches him, very carefully, wondering what he was going to say in reply to her admission. But he comes up speechless and she sees the way he tries to form words but falls short on what to say.

"Wow…I…" is all he manages and she smiles lightly because she can see the gears turning in his head at a thousand miles an hour while he thinks over what she just told him. She doesn't blame his speechlessness, when she found out she'd sat in her bathroom for an entire hour just staring at the little stick that told her the life she knew was about to change. Drastically.

"I know it is a lot to take in" she begins and he lifts his gaze back to her when she squeezes his hand lightly "For a while after the local doctor had confirmed it I really wasn't sure what to do, and I admit that I thought about raising the child myself as I have no wish to get rid of the baby, however the more I thought about it the more I understood that it was wrong for me to even think about not telling you" she gets out, trying to make him understand just what her mind was thinking about this new situation.

She watches him swallow the nervous lump in his throat before he suddenly looks like a fragile child, on the verge of breaking.

"So you came all this way just to tell me?" he asks and his voice is quiet, disappointed. She then understands his reaction, he thought she came all this way just to inform him and then she would be off on her way to some other country with his child and he would never see her again.

To be honest she doesn't know what she is going to do. That would probably be the option she would have went for if he didn't want anything to do with the child but by the look on his face and how tight his hand has gotten around hers, she's not sure that he likes the idea of that choice. And _that_, suddenly has her heart rate jumping in her chest.

"I came all this way to let you decide what it is you would like to do. I am having the child that is for sure, whether or not you would like to be involved will decide my next step, because I cannot take that step until I know what it is you would like" she explains to him and he lets out a breath she hadn't noticed he was holding in and his hand relaxes in hers.

"I would like to be involved wholeheartedly with this, no doubt about it" he tells her, even if he's slightly scared at the idea of himself as a father, this is what he wants. And he doesn't have to think twice about it. He stares into her eyes and he holds her gaze, waiting for her reply. Now that he has given her the answer she was seeking, what will be her next step?

She blinks and looks down at their hands linked together on her lap. Now that she knows he wants to be involved, what's her next step? She hadn't thought this far, she'd been too worried about telling him she was pregnant in the first place.

"Are you going to stay here? In America?" he suddenly asks her and she lifts her gaze back to his. His eyes are shining so bright right now, with hope, hope that she will stay. He asked her to come back with him all those months ago and she realizes then that he hasn't changed his mind on his offer to her.

"Yes" she whispers. Because she doesn't really have to think about it. Tony wants to be involved and she will never take his right from him, and being here in America with him will be the best for their child. And after all, she's an American now. This was her home, no matter how much she tried to move on in life in the last few months in other places around the world where her home used to be, she was in the end brought back where she belongs.

He moves forward then and his hand touches the side of her face, his fingers brushing into the start of her hair. She couldn't help but close her eyes at his touch and then she felt his forehead rest against hers and his breath was against her lips.

"Stay here, with me?" he breathed. She knew fully well the weight of his question. He wanted her to live here, with him in this very apartment. She knows they haven't established where they were going with their relationship on this little journey they were about to start but she couldn't help but think he's made his decision on it. If he wants her to move in with him, he's serious about this. And not just serious about having a baby with her but he's serious about _her_.

It scares her a little to think about it. She knows that he loves her, sure he hasn't outright told her but he doesn't have to say it for her to know. It's in the way he looks at her, the way he touches her. The way he made love to her. She may be stubborn and avoid it as much as she can, but she's no fool.

And she knows she loves him back, however that doesn't help her be terrified at the thought a being with him, wholeheartedly as his. It's been so long for them, such a long time coming with so much in their past but she cannot help but be scared of it. Her love for him has always terrified her but it has never stopped her from feeling it.

Maybe it's about time they start embracing it.

"I asked you all those months ago to come back with me, and my offer still stands… for exactly what I meant back then" he whispers to her when she doesn't answer right away. He wants her to know exactly what he was offering with that statement. As he leans back and catches her eyes she realises just how serious he is about the two of them, finally going somewhere with what they feel.

"I would…like that very much" she replies and when she smiles at him softly his face splits into a grin. Had she just said yes?

He sees the way her eyes fall to his lips just then, exactly the same way they did when they kissed goodbye that night at the airport. He doesn't hesitate when he leans forward and softly presses his lips to hers, where they belong.

He wasn't going to let her out of his grip again, he just cannot and he hopes she realises this. Because letting go of her once was more than enough in his lifetime. He never wants to have to do that again, and he hopes he won't.

* * *

She didn't stay long that night. He'd made her some tea and they had chatted lightly, mostly about his cases and about her travels. He left out how much he had missed her while she was gone, how much he had regretted leaving her there even if it hadn't been his decision to make.

He knows she had agreed to move in with him, to do this with him and to _be _with him but he knows it will still take it's time. It's not like she's going to move in right away and they will be the happiest couple in the universe with no problems. Things take time and so for this to work they would do it the best way possible.

They would take it step by step.

He knows she's staying at a motel right now, which isn't the best but this is how she wanted to do it, she didn't want to rush this because they had spent so long avoiding it that it deserved to be done right. And when he thinks about it, he wouldn't have it any other way.

Before she left that night he asked her to come out with him for dinner on Friday night, and she had agreed with a grin on her lips and a twinkle in her eye. Because they both knew he wasn't just asking her to have dinner with him like they used to, he was asking her out. On a date.

This was something new for them and at the same time that it had him nervous it also had him excited. Because this was territory they weren't used to, this was all new to them. Everything from here on was going to be new for them.

Dating, living together. Having a child together.

He's not a man that is big on change, change in his life scares him because he knows how good he has it and he doesn't want to lose it. But he knows for once he is going to embrace this change with a new positive attitude. Because having a kid and being with the woman he loves couldn't possibly be something negative to change in his life.

He feels like it's the biggest and most rewarding change in his life as a person. Finally his life, other than his career, will have something completely amazing to show for.

After waiting so long for something permanent he was finally being blessed. And he wonders what it was that he did to deserve such a gift.


	3. Chapter 3

She cannot help but think that telling Tony about her being pregnant had gone better than she thought it would have. It had been such a major relief of stress off her shoulders. She doesn't know why she had stressed the discussion so much or why she thought the conversation would turn rocky, this was _Tony_, her Tony, the one who is rock on the outside but a hundred percent soft and cuddly on the inside. She should have known better than to think he wouldn't react in a bad way.

With the way he reacted to her and what he offered, she couldn't help but feel a flutter in her heart. She knows she let him go home by himself at the airport a couple months ago, even when he had asked her to come back with him. She knows she was leaving because she had to make a change in her life and she turned him down, no matter how much that had crushed her heart to let him go.

She knows she loves him, she has for a long time now and she knows that his feelings a very much the same to her own. But once things had changed she knew she had to come back to him, even though she didn't plan on coming back. Maybe this situation that has arisen between them had woken her up, made her see that she didn't have to run away from him to change her life for the better. No, she can be right by his side and yet make that change she wants.

She knew if he didn't want anything to do with their child she wouldn't probably have stayed in America but did she really doubt him not wanting to be involved? Of course deep down she knew he would want to be involved as much as he has expressed already. Because he was Tony and Tony didn't just give up and look the other way on something like this.

She knows he wants a family as much as she does, even though the both of them don't have very good examples of their own families. She also knows he is probably as scared as she is about it. Because honestly she never thought she would actually have a family in her life and as happy as she is that this one dream of hers is going to be true, it doesn't lesson how terrified she is. She is not sure what kind of mother she was going to make.

All she knows is she will try the best she could and she would hope that it would be enough. She is also going to have Tony there for her and she knows he won't be leaving her side anytime soon, let alone if he ever will.

When he offered her to come back with him last time that offer had been to come home with him, not back to NCIS. She knows that ever since then he was ready to do this with her, take their feelings somewhere and she knows that when he offered it again last night that it wasn't just because she was pregnant that he was offering, it was because his feelings still stood the same. He still wanted to be with her.

They were partners, they would always be partners. This time it was just going to be in a different capacity.

She's not sure what this will be like, sure they know each other better than themselves sometimes and have been very close for a long time, but they have never done the dating thing before. Sure they shared one night together and it was one of the most memorable nights of her life, but that doesn't make this any easier. It's still makes her nervous to think about it, however she is also excited.

She's wanted to have something like this with Tony for years but she never thought it would actually happen. But now here they are and that is exactly what they are going to start doing. Maybe this situation was a gift to them, finally giving them push they needed. Because they were both too stubborn and scared to take that step by themselves.

She's excited for new things but she also knows they have to take their time, and this is what she had talked to Tony about. And he had thought the same thing. They agreed to take this slow, step by step. Because with them, how long they have held out, this is the way it should be.

She's quite happy to stay in this hotel for now, it's nice and she likes the lady that runs the place. She doesn't know when it will be that she will eventually move in with Tony, she just knows it will happen when they are both ready. She's always appreciated the way her and Tony just jelled so easy, the way their minds just worked so alike. That their thoughts were the same.

She knows exactly where she and Tony stand now and the next thing on her mind was the team. She's back and she's staying, however she doesn't know how she is going to go about telling the team all of this. Also if she should tell them she's pregnant.

After thinking about it a little she knows she shouldn't tell them the whole pregnant thing because that's not just for her to decide. However she knows she should get around to telling them she's back. Tony said they've all been missing her. She knows the first person on her list is Gibbs and after sending Tony a text to find out if they are still at work or not and when she finds out that Gibbs has given them the night off, she finds herself parked outside the older man's house, contemplating what she is about to say.

She walks in his house, still unlocked, nothing much has changed in the months she has been gone. Sure she saw Tony a few months ago but the rest she hasn't seen for quite a few more than that. She goes to the door that leads to his basement and her hand pauses on the handle for a few short moments before she opens the door and takes the first few steps.

She hears him working, tool against wood, but as soon as she hits the second step his work stills. He hears his visitor. She wonders what he will think when he sees her because when she called him all those months ago she'd told him she wouldn't be back. But here she was. When she hits the steps halfway down and his gaze catches hers, yes he's surprised. It's probably the only time she's arrived unannounced before and he's actually been surprised to see her.

He doesn't say anything, the whole way down the steps of his basement were in silence, all he does is get out two glasses and as he goes to pour them she holds out her hand.

"Not for me thank you" she says, because she knows she cannot drink. Not with the child growing in her womb. Not that Gibbs knows that and yes he is surprised when she turned down the drink. "However I still want the conversation that goes with that drink" she says and smiles lightly. She remembers the last time she consoled in him with a conversation, he had poured the drinks and he had listened, he had given his advice. And he had helped.

She missed moments like that with him.

She sees the spark in his eye after he finishes pouring one glass, a sign of a silent Gibbs smile. When he looks back up at her she cannot help but take a step forward and hug the man in front of her, the one who is so much like a father to her. And the fact that he hugs her back means the world. Because she had left him, she had just up and left her family without a proper goodbye.

"What changed your mind?" he asks and when he releases her she steps back. She knows he knows how serious she was about not coming back so he knows there must be something that made her decided to change that seriousness.

He watches as she turns shy and guarded about his question but he knows she will tell him, so he takes a sip of his scotch and waits her out.

"Things are not the same as when I made my initial decision" she explained and he sees the way she stares at the ground as she confesses. There is something she is trying to keep from him but at the same time she is trying to tell him what he needs to know.

She pulls up one of his wooden bar seats and looks up at his curious gaze.

"I just want you to know that I will not be leaving again, I am staying home for good" she told him, holding his gaze the whole time. He knows she isn't lying. She is being completely honest and he trusts her word.

He isn't completely sure if she is telling him this in the interest of his father figure side or his boss side. So he has to set things straight.

"You know I cannot take you back on my team Ziver, I already have another agent-" he began but he was cut off midsentence.

"I did not come back for my job Gibbs, I am still moving on from that part of my life" she explained to him and he watched her curiously. A few things started to click into place. Including DiNozzo's light, happy and at peace mood as of two days ago.

"You came back for _him_" it wasn't a question but a statement. And by the way her eyes dropped from his again he knew he was right. Gibbs didn't have to say Tony's name for them to both know who he was talking about.

"More or less, yes" she stated and lifted her eyes back to his. He could tell those words were a little hard for her to say to him but she said them.

"More or less?" he asks, because he knows there is something she isn't quite telling him.

"There are things that are not for me to tell you alone" she explained and she'd gone very nervous at that admission. He knows she's not ready to tell him and as it seems not without Tony present. So he would not push her, he knows she will come to him in time. However that doesn't calm down his gut from going crazy right now.

"You two got married and didn't tell me?" he said lightly, cracking a small joke. And by the way her face lit up in a small smile he knows she remembers all those years ago when he made the joke the first time.

"No" she laughed softly "How do you think Abby would feel if we simply eloped?" she cracked back and he chuckled lightly. However he did realize how she held the question easily, like she wasn't bothered by the thought of marrying Tony. That was interesting.

His laughter settled and she was still smiling at him.

"It's good that you're home Ziver" he admitted and she reached out for another hug at that. She'd grown on him very strongly in the years she had been at NCIS and having her back, where she belongs. It was good.

He couldn't begin to imagine how his Senior Agent felt about her return, he knows Tony loves this woman in his arms with all his heart.


End file.
